Friday fun..

Some jokes...funny or not funny?

Roger left for work on Friday morning.  Friday was payday, so instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending his entire pay packet.

Finally, Roger appeared at home on Sunday night, and obviously he was confronted by his angry wife, Martha who castigated Roger for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions.  Finally, Martha stopped the nagging and said to Roger, 'How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?'

Roger replied grimly, 'That would be fine with me.'

Monday went by and he didn't see his Martha. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results.

By the Thursday, the swelling had gone down just enough so that Roger he could see Martha a little out of the corner of his left eye.....

Myra Rhodes, a little old lady living in Great Baddow, Essex, answered a knock on the door one Friday, to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

'Good morning, Ma'am,' said the young man. 'If I could take a couple minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners.'

'Go away!' said Myra brusquely. 'I'm broke and haven't got any money,' and she proceeded to close the door.

Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open. 'Don't be too hasty,' he commanded. 'Not until you have at least seen my demonstration.' And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet.

'Now, if this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder.'

Myra stepped back and said with a smile, 'Well let me get you a spoon, young man because they cut off my electricity this morning.'

this is my dog after hearing another cat joke ....

What's a good price for a lesson?

Or to put it another way-what's a good lesson worth? In financial terms.And what's a fair price for the teacher to make a decent enough living?These seem like fairly simple questions but when you live between two countries which have two different currencies ,as I do , and your students pay you in a third or fourth currency because of where they are based it actually becomes quite complicated -unless you work with a company or agent who collects fee's ,takes their cut and sends the balance to you in a single currency which you then convert or not.
If you work for yourself in this area then  its up to you to decide a pricing scheme which is suitable for all nationalities while continuing to provide you with a living wage.
I am not greedy but I do have expenses ,like everyone,although as someone who is self employed my over heads are low.I try to be honest in my pricing.I know what I need to make on a monthly basis to cover my lifestyle but I also know what the average income is in a lot of other countries and this is what helps me decide on a fair price for the student and a fair rate for my work.
When working with people from around the globe I have found the best and safest method of payment for both students and myself  is Paypal.Its simple to use and quick to show payments.I rarely offer credit to students-there is the odd exception -so Paypal is a swift way to remedy a zero balance for lesson credits .
I have put together a package of lessons at Sterling ,Euro and Dollar rates.Please contact me on Skype at michelesenglish or via email at sheridanmichele@hotmail.com if you are interested in more information.

Autumn -a time of change and projects!

The evenings are getting dark earlier,the trees are mid way between beautiful and bare and the rain is pouring ...Autumn has arrived in the UK.We can look forward to many months of rain ,cold and darkness until we hopefully receive some snow or winter sun.

This is the time that, as a freelancer/self employed teacher, I work my longest hours.What else is there to do?It is also the time when student demand for lessons goes up.My students have started thinking about their targets in terms of their ability to use English and how they want it to develop over the coming months.They also just want to work or study.I currently have twenty nine regular student who I meet between one and three times a week and all have just completed tests so we can assess where they currently are in terms of levels and ability and plan for the coming months.

I have found ,after teaching for many years,that Autumn and Winter are when students really like to focus on the nitty gritty of grammar and writing skills.A number of my students really enjoy having an  extended project to prepare and develop and then present to me.These projects are broad in their scope and scale and also in the range of subjects.Its an interesting time for me as I tend to learn something new from these students about their culture or traditions.

For example ,a student recently presented a topic on what is important to Russians living in Russia.The three most important things from my students point of view were
 a) a personal library-books are highly valued in a lot of Russian households,
 b) the Church-a cause of much discussion and the popularity of the Church is on the increase..
 c ) the village house or Dacha-almost all Russian people have some connection to the land and value this connection.
I really enjoy thinking about a project for different students and as a teacher its a very valuable exercise to give to  longer term or regular students.For the online student its something different from the usual book based activities and it gives them the opportunity to have some more control over their own learning.As teachers we know the areas of strengths and weaknesses in our students and so we can give as little or as much guidance as needed for each individual student.My students use PPP's ,music and photos along with text to present their completed work.They prepare for the presentation so that they plan how to speak and what to say.They have to find the correct vocabulary and use their imagination as they are also challenged to be as creative as possible.The majority of students who have been given a project to complete have a four week time scale in which to deliver the goods and so far most have met the deadline.