Friday fun..

Some jokes...funny or not funny?

Roger left for work on Friday morning.  Friday was payday, so instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending his entire pay packet.

Finally, Roger appeared at home on Sunday night, and obviously he was confronted by his angry wife, Martha who castigated Roger for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions.  Finally, Martha stopped the nagging and said to Roger, 'How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?'

Roger replied grimly, 'That would be fine with me.'

Monday went by and he didn't see his Martha. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results.

By the Thursday, the swelling had gone down just enough so that Roger he could see Martha a little out of the corner of his left eye.....

Myra Rhodes, a little old lady living in Great Baddow, Essex, answered a knock on the door one Friday, to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

'Good morning, Ma'am,' said the young man. 'If I could take a couple minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners.'

'Go away!' said Myra brusquely. 'I'm broke and haven't got any money,' and she proceeded to close the door.

Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open. 'Don't be too hasty,' he commanded. 'Not until you have at least seen my demonstration.' And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet.

'Now, if this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder.'

Myra stepped back and said with a smile, 'Well let me get you a spoon, young man because they cut off my electricity this morning.'

this is my dog after hearing another cat joke ....

What's a good price for a lesson?

Or to put it another way-what's a good lesson worth? In financial terms.And what's a fair price for the teacher to make a decent enough living?These seem like fairly simple questions but when you live between two countries which have two different currencies ,as I do , and your students pay you in a third or fourth currency because of where they are based it actually becomes quite complicated -unless you work with a company or agent who collects fee's ,takes their cut and sends the balance to you in a single currency which you then convert or not.
If you work for yourself in this area then  its up to you to decide a pricing scheme which is suitable for all nationalities while continuing to provide you with a living wage.
I am not greedy but I do have expenses ,like everyone,although as someone who is self employed my over heads are low.I try to be honest in my pricing.I know what I need to make on a monthly basis to cover my lifestyle but I also know what the average income is in a lot of other countries and this is what helps me decide on a fair price for the student and a fair rate for my work.
When working with people from around the globe I have found the best and safest method of payment for both students and myself  is Paypal.Its simple to use and quick to show payments.I rarely offer credit to students-there is the odd exception -so Paypal is a swift way to remedy a zero balance for lesson credits .
I have put together a package of lessons at Sterling ,Euro and Dollar rates.Please contact me on Skype at michelesenglish or via email at sheridanmichele@hotmail.com if you are interested in more information.

Autumn -a time of change and projects!

The evenings are getting dark earlier,the trees are mid way between beautiful and bare and the rain is pouring ...Autumn has arrived in the UK.We can look forward to many months of rain ,cold and darkness until we hopefully receive some snow or winter sun.

This is the time that, as a freelancer/self employed teacher, I work my longest hours.What else is there to do?It is also the time when student demand for lessons goes up.My students have started thinking about their targets in terms of their ability to use English and how they want it to develop over the coming months.They also just want to work or study.I currently have twenty nine regular student who I meet between one and three times a week and all have just completed tests so we can assess where they currently are in terms of levels and ability and plan for the coming months.

I have found ,after teaching for many years,that Autumn and Winter are when students really like to focus on the nitty gritty of grammar and writing skills.A number of my students really enjoy having an  extended project to prepare and develop and then present to me.These projects are broad in their scope and scale and also in the range of subjects.Its an interesting time for me as I tend to learn something new from these students about their culture or traditions.

For example ,a student recently presented a topic on what is important to Russians living in Russia.The three most important things from my students point of view were
 a) a personal library-books are highly valued in a lot of Russian households,
 b) the Church-a cause of much discussion and the popularity of the Church is on the increase..
 c ) the village house or Dacha-almost all Russian people have some connection to the land and value this connection.
I really enjoy thinking about a project for different students and as a teacher its a very valuable exercise to give to  longer term or regular students.For the online student its something different from the usual book based activities and it gives them the opportunity to have some more control over their own learning.As teachers we know the areas of strengths and weaknesses in our students and so we can give as little or as much guidance as needed for each individual student.My students use PPP's ,music and photos along with text to present their completed work.They prepare for the presentation so that they plan how to speak and what to say.They have to find the correct vocabulary and use their imagination as they are also challenged to be as creative as possible.The majority of students who have been given a project to complete have a four week time scale in which to deliver the goods and so far most have met the deadline.

Online English Lessons: Student numbers increasing...

Online English Lessons: Student numbers increasing...

Student numbers increasing...

I have been teaching on line for a number of years now and the summer months have always been unpredictable in terms of student numbers.Some students stop because of family commitments while others feel like they just need a bit of a rest ,an easier schedule.Often I have younger students (aged between 12-16) who either stop completely or actually increase their lessons.Or rather ,their parents choose one option or the other.

This year has been even  more unpredictable than usual.As a result of the global economic downturn and the stress on peoples pockets continues to increase ,plus the continued sanctions imposed on countries such as Russia my private student numbers have taken a tumble during the last year.My hours went from a fairly routine nine to five to being all over the place.I realised I had to make some changes in my working life so as not to find myself in a position where I was tied to my desk for twenty hours a day in order to earn what I need to meet the bills.
I made a decision to start a Facebook page devoted to on line teaching of English to non native speakers a while ago and have been trying to keep it going.I promised myself,and have failed so far,to update my blog at least weekly.I also promised myself to develop my own website where students could contact me more easily.This I have also failed in due to both lack of technical knowledge and time.I did join LinkedIn and start to make new connections with people from around the globe .Not just students but also other teachers ,owners of schools and people interested in the profession.
Its now the first week of June ,the sun has finally come out in Yorkshire and I find that demand for lessons appears to have really increased.Its interesting to note that the majority of requests for lessons that I receive now are coming through LinkedIn and most of the students are young professionals already living in an English speaking country.Also of note is the fact that a good proportion of these students are professionally linked to the world of finance.They tell me that despite having an advanced level of English its just not quite good enough to give them that edge in a very competitive job market.Pronunciation is one of the main issues for these students.
I take my hat of to all students of English.Its not easy to learn.It can be very very confusing.I am constantly impressed by the ability of the students I teach.And thankfully the numbers are up....

How to train for IELTS

IELTS-the International English Language Testing System is still one of the most common exams taken by non native speakers.It provides a benchmark as to someone's level and ability in English.It is particularly useful for those who wish to move or study abroad but also for those who wish to stay in their native countries but work for international companies.
The exam itself is not that difficult to pass if you train well in advance for it.The structure of the exam and what the examiners want is very important for the student to know about-without this knowledge the student is already behind.
How to prepare?
I think a student who is around intermediate level should give themselves a good 4-6 months to prepare.Each student is different but daily practice is required in order to improve ability and skills.

1-Decide if you need General or Academic IELTS
2-Study the test format and become familiar with its structure and very importantly the time limits for each section.
3-Check the content of each of the 4 tested skill areas so you are completely familiar with the types of activities you may have to complete.
4-find a good experienced teacher.This can be in person ,in a classroom setting or on line.
5-The internet is stuffed full of resources for the purposes of practice -use it well.Look at the following regularly
http://takeielts.britishcouncil.org/prepare-test/how-prepare-ielts-test
http://www.cambridgeenglish.org/exams/ielts/
6-Make yourself have daily practice-watch an English film without subtitles,listen to English radio channels,read English language books in an genre-basically immerse yourself in the language.

where does the time go....?

Busy ,busy ,busy....its been a manic month or so and therefore its been difficult to stick to my resolution to write this blog much more regularly.
I've been rushed off my feet,pushing my limits,been pulled in all directions ....
Things are beginning to settle.
At this time of year changes happen with my students.Some drop away as they prepare for state exams and summer holidays.Others become more intensely focused on their learning because they are preparing for English language exams which often take place in early summer.Some students change their course for summer and study slang or language for travel.And the remainder continue on their chosen course.
At the moment the students I teach hail from a variety of locations .I have a couple of French students,about 12 Russian students,one from Spain,a Portuguese lady ,two from Brazil and a few from China.I like this mix.The ability is also mixed so lessons at the moment are very interesting for me.